First Short Story Child

Picture this, child, middle of October, 10:00 pm and I decide to hit the gym. I walk outside and realize its 70 degrees out, so I'm all saying and gay gasping to myself, "Hoagh forget the gym! I am totally going to go running along the east river down to Williamsburg bridge and back".  So I do child and had a great run and of course totally feeling it with the nice weather, awesome views, nice surroundings, and of course my recently downloaded Nic Fanciulli podcast to jam to.  

So anyways, on my way back up to midtown, my phone rings and it's my cousin so of course I answer it because she is on her way to NYC the following weekend and we have to get some details sorted and such. Last I remember is when I answered the phone I put my keys, which I had in my hands the whole time, in my pocket.  So then I am all talking for about 10 minutes and when I hang up, I am for sure in a real good mood, because I am excited my cousin is coming for a visit!  So I reach into my pocket and fuckin' hell, my keys are not there! And then child I reach around and find there is a hole in my pocket!  Fuck!!!!!  So I get into my building and go to my neighbors to see if I can crawl from his window onto the fire escape and just hopefully, hopefully, get to our bedroom window and open it and vuoila, I am in my apt.  So after taking my neighbor's ac unit out of the window and crawling to the fire escape I try to push the window up and of course it is locked!!  And then child I remember Jamie telling me "Make sure you keep the window to the fire escape locked so no one can break in."  Yep.  

So what do I end up doing you ask?  I end up retracing my steps and scour with my phone flashlight the whole 4 miles of terrain that I ran on the east river!  Mind you it's about midnight when I start to do this.  Oh and did I mention my boyfriend, Jamie, is in India for two weeks and his keys are in the apartment on his dresser!? Ay ay ay. So then child, I never find the keys and by the time I make it back to my apartment and call a locksmith, It's 2:30 in the fucking morning, and I have a 9:00 meeting on a job site (I'm an Designer and Project Architect).  So when Mr. Locksmith Rip Off shows up, its 3:30 in the morning now and there is homeboy drilling through my old lock and retrofitting me with a new one.  Hundreds of dollars later and finally in my apartment, I take a shower, and go to bed at 4:30!  Fucking hell I tell you....  

So basically the moral of the story is, well you have 4 choices:

A. Always have a spare set of keys at your office or with a friend.

B. Don't lose your keys while your boyfriend is out of town. 

C. Don't wear running shorts with a hole in the pocket.

D. Don't go running at night while your boyfriend is out of town..

And the downfall continues!  More to come..........................Child